Mon, 11 Oct 2004, 08:58
Frank needs a meeting. While I haven't had a drink since November 2 , 1985, there are times when all the old feelings bubble up, my life is unmanageable, and a good way to deal with the emotional storms and psychic and spiritual emptiness is to check in at a 12 step meeting.
I like to influence outcomes. I think intentional behavior with an eye on the outcome is a good thing. But there's a pivot point where the old AA folks say you have to "let go and let God" take care of things. The G word trips up a lot of us. As a devout non-theist myself, I don't have a clue what it means to let God do anything. "Turning it over to a higher power" is unnatural for me. The way I'm wired, I somehow think that stewing about matters, worrying about issues that I am relatively powerless to influence is the best way to live my life. What has it done for me? Well, it's certainly turned some low points into deep valleys of despair. What I could have walked through or skipped across with detachment, I've allowed to drag me down and keep me there for far longer than necessary.
I'm going thorugh a period now when worries about contracts, hassles with other bull-headed people, and a general sense that my way is the right way and an incredulous wonder that everybody doesn't get it are tearing me down. There are people out there who empathize, who have experienced the same things, who are willing to offer support at the merest hint that it would be welcomed. These people can be found at 12 step meetings, among other places.
I need a meeting.
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Comments
2.5 years sober here, and i went to a meeting last night and tonight for pretty much exactly the same reason.
it's not that i have been feeling any danger signals or anything like that. just, when things are happening in my life that are causing an undue amount of stress, it can't hurt to get some perspective on things. and you know what? it worked.
good to see a little activity over here.
While I've only been sober for about 6 months, I recognize the feelings.
The deal is knowing what we can't control, and then just, well, surfing. I body surfed a good bit, and you learn to feel when to swim like hell, and when to hold still and not fight the wave.
For me this is a really good metaphor.
Is this journal still active? I would like to participate.
Why do i feel like i have a very bad hang over?and have not drank, in 3 days except for just one
Lisa in Ark.
I wish you could let your "I quit smoking" buddies play on this blog. I don't have a place to go with any non-smoking buddies.
i need to quit smokin...drinkin...eatin.... all the things in life that i embrace.... how do we tackle all of this???
quiting drinking is going to be one of the hardest things I will ever do....
Well, hang in there Tyler and don't try to quit forever. Instead, quit one day at a time. If you can get up in the morning and promise yourself not to drink today, and go to bed at night having kept that promise, then you are well on the road to where you want to be.
I want to quit drinking. My wife drinks a couple of glasses of wine in the evening with no problems of control. I can't. I have one and just keep on going. Any ideas about how to quit drinking when your spouse doesn't need to? I wake up in the morning and say I'm not going to drink today and then grab that wine bottle when I get home.
Appreciate some advice.
Rich
Rich, it's simple (if not always easy). You just don't pick up the glass and move it to your lips. At first it can be hard, but after a while it will get easier. I quit 9 weeks ago and my husband still drinks. Now it's not really a big issue- he drinks and I don't.
There's a message board link on the upper left. It's a great board with lots of people and support if you're interested in quitting!
